Carbuncle is a recurring summon in the Final Fantasy series, but as always, Final Fantasy VIII does it best. Carbuncle is at its peak cuteness in VIII. Look […]
Laguna’s little green truck that goes beep beep, probably
At one point in FF8‘s development, Laguna had a little green truck that he would drive around Winhill when he was fighting monsters and performing general duties as […]
It is once again Shut the Fuck Up Saturday
Rinoa, shut the fuck up. Squall just watched his friends almost die in a missile/robot attack. This is not about you right now.
T-Rexaur is one of the most powerful creatures in the entire Final Fantasy universe
According to the Scan text for T-Rexaur, it has been “alive since the beginning of time.”
THE BEGINNING OF TIME.
It’s Shut the Fuck Up Saturday again
Irvine shut the fuck up. What the fuck. Leave her alone.
It’s Shut the Fuck Up Saturday
Quistis, shut the fuck up. What the fuck.
The love story IS the story
I’ve played Final Fantasy VIII all the way through twice: first when it came out, when I was around 10 years old, then again in 2022 at the […]
Big Selphie isn’t real and can’t hurt you
If Big Selphie was real, she would ride on the outside of the train.
Who’s eating flowers at Balamb Garden?
If you look through the Balamb Garden website, you can find announcement from the Library Committee, which sheds some light on the books that the students at Balamb […]
This Rinoa fansite has been been running since 1999, and we are visitor 2000000
Today, we salute a veteran of the hopeless cause of FF8 fandom: Sheila Knight, whose Rinoa Heartilly fansite Rebelling Princess has been running for TWENTY-FIVE YEARS.
I was not expecting Final Fantasy VIII to be the reason Phil learned that I am obsessed with measuring things
So, I am weird. I really, really like measuring things. I keep measuring tapes with me in multiple locations, including my office desk (where I have two types). […]
I will not defend the amnesia orphanage twist but it’s better than that Zack shit
I’ll say it: I do not care for the orphanage plotline in Final Fantasy VIII. It comes out of nowhere with very little foreshadowing, and it’s just too […]
It’s actually for the best that FF8 doesn’t let you play as a little freak
A random observation: Final Fantasy VIII breaks a streak of Final Fantasy games from 1994–2002 letting you play as freaky dudes.
Adel is incredibly ripped: an investigation
The following real conversation occurred between this blog’s editors Phil and AL when discussing how Sorceress Adel was able to achieve so much during her despotic rule and how she got so swole (and 23 feet tall).
Laguna is a big himbo
There was gonna be more to this post but honestly Laguna is a himbo and we all know it. What else is there to say.
SeeD: An elite mercenary force? No
SeeD is a Garden-related pun, but it has another meaning. Are they actually meeting their goals? Let’s break this down…
The Sorceress’ Knight is the Best Romance Trope Ever and Yes, I Will Die on This Hill
The Sorceress’ Knight is a gift to humanity. It is the pinnacle of bodyguard fiction, the zenith of courtly love. It is love and devotion and care wrapped up into one role and it is delicious.
The Waltz for the Moon scene is more than just a dance
One of the most iconic scenes from Final Fantasy VIII is the “Waltz for the Moon” ballroom dance. It’s the first time in the narrative that we see […]
Every FF8 boss ranked based on how bad they could fuck you up IRL
A reasonable attempt to determine how fucked we’d truly be in the world of FF8.
Squall is so talented that he drinks from his eyeball
Can your favorite protagonist drink from his eyeball while also being the best looking guy there? I think not. Squall 1- everyone else 0.
Get you a man who will jump into the infinite void of space for you
My expectations of romance are completely unrealistic because I watched Squall jump into space with absolutely no backup plan on how to save either of them when I […]
Dude, you can launch a dog off your arm
What’s not to love about a game where a legit move is that you can launch your pet dog off your arm to attack your enemies????
Selphie is a lovable, destructive menace
I have always defended characters in Final Fantasy VIII who are actually great characters (not you Quistis. You’re a creep.). I’ve written an entire piece on my personal […]
Posture check for Rinoa
Girl what the hell your skeleton isn’t supposed to do that. No wonder you’re asleep for the entire Disc 3, your upper back’s gotta feel like shit. Have fun Angelo Searching for Motrin when you’re 30.
The art of storytelling in the Brothers Guardian Force
The Guardian Force animations are probably too long. One of the best parts of the FFVIII remaster is the ability to set the game to 300% speed, allowing […]