Skip to content

Final Fantasy VIII is the Best

And If You Don't Agree I Will Destroy You

  • About
  • why are you like this
  • Scream at me
Not being able to name your party in FF8 was a bold break from tradition
Characters / Essays / Game Mechanics / History

Not being able to name your party in FF8 was a bold break from tradition

Posted on: April 13, 2025April 13, 2025

The first seven numbered Final Fantasy games let you name your characters. Final Fantasy VIII is the first one that in the series, for the most part, doesn’t. […]

Seifer got that grandpa fit
Characters / Nonsense

Seifer got that grandpa fit

Posted on: February 26, 2025February 26, 2025

Phil recently brought up Seifer’s duster jacket and its journey through the story of Final Fantasy VIII, but I wanna bring up his grandpa fit. Do you SEE […]

Do you think Seifer cleans his pristine ankle-length coat by hand
Characters / Nonsense

Do you think Seifer cleans his pristine ankle-length coat by hand

Posted on: February 6, 2025February 7, 2025

Dude’s gotta be walking through dirt and puddles but that thing looks immaculate across three discs. What is the dry cleaning situation in Galbadia?

A holiday themed appreciation post for the incredible fan art by Skribleskrable
Characters / Creativity / Other People Who Get It

A holiday themed appreciation post for the incredible fan art by Skribleskrable

Posted on: December 20, 2024

The holidays are coming up next week, so there is no better time than now to do an appreciation post for one of (if not the) greatest Final […]

Carbuncle is just a lil guy
Characters / Nonsense

Carbuncle is just a lil guy

Posted on: November 2, 2024February 2, 2025

Carbuncle is a recurring summon in the Final Fantasy series, but as always, Final Fantasy VIII does it best. Carbuncle is at its peak cuteness in VIII. Look […]

Laguna’s little green truck that goes beep beep, probably
Characters / Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore

Laguna’s little green truck that goes beep beep, probably

Posted on: November 1, 2024February 2, 2025

At one point in FF8‘s development, Laguna had a little green truck that he would drive around Winhill when he was fighting monsters and performing general duties as […]

It is once again Shut the Fuck Up Saturday
Characters / General Screaming

It is once again Shut the Fuck Up Saturday

Posted on: October 26, 2024October 26, 2024

Rinoa, shut the fuck up. Squall just watched his friends almost die in a missile/robot attack. This is not about you right now.

T-Rexaur is one of the most powerful creatures in the entire Final Fantasy universe
Characters / Nonsense

T-Rexaur is one of the most powerful creatures in the entire Final Fantasy universe

Posted on: September 24, 2024September 24, 2024

According to the Scan text for T-Rexaur, it has been “alive since the beginning of time.”

THE BEGINNING OF TIME.

It’s Shut the Fuck Up Saturday again
Characters / General Screaming

It’s Shut the Fuck Up Saturday again

Posted on: August 17, 2024August 10, 2024

Irvine shut the fuck up. What the fuck. Leave her alone.

It’s Shut the Fuck Up Saturday
Characters / General Screaming

It’s Shut the Fuck Up Saturday

Posted on: August 10, 2024

Quistis, shut the fuck up. What the fuck.

The love story IS the story
Characters / Essays / Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore / Personal Stories

The love story IS the story

Posted on: April 30, 2024October 27, 2024

I’ve played Final Fantasy VIII all the way through twice: first when it came out, when I was around 10 years old, then again in 2022 at the […]

Big Selphie isn’t real and can’t hurt you
Characters / Nonsense

Big Selphie isn’t real and can’t hurt you

Posted on: April 29, 2024April 28, 2024

If Big Selphie was real, she would ride on the outside of the train.

Who’s eating flowers at Balamb Garden?
Characters / Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore

Who’s eating flowers at Balamb Garden?

Posted on: April 29, 2024April 6, 2025

If you look through the Balamb Garden website, you can find announcement from the Library Committee, which sheds some light on the books that the students at Balamb […]

This Rinoa fansite has been been running since 1999, and we are visitor 2000000
Characters / Other People Who Get It

This Rinoa fansite has been been running since 1999, and we are visitor 2000000

Posted on: April 27, 2024April 27, 2024

Today, we salute a veteran of the hopeless cause of FF8 fandom: Sheila Knight, whose Rinoa Heartilly fansite Rebelling Princess has been running for TWENTY-FIVE YEARS.

I was not expecting Final Fantasy VIII to be the reason Phil learned that I am obsessed with measuring things
Characters / General Screaming / Nonsense

I was not expecting Final Fantasy VIII to be the reason Phil learned that I am obsessed with measuring things

Posted on: April 25, 2024April 28, 2024

So, I am weird. I really, really like measuring things. I keep measuring tapes with me in multiple locations, including my office desk (where I have two types). […]

I will not defend the amnesia orphanage twist but it’s better than that Zack shit
Characters / Essays / Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore / Regrettable Things

I will not defend the amnesia orphanage twist but it’s better than that Zack shit

Posted on: April 6, 2024April 13, 2025

I’ll say it: I do not care for the orphanage plotline in Final Fantasy VIII. It comes out of nowhere with very little foreshadowing, and it’s just too […]

It’s actually for the best that FF8 doesn’t let you play as a little freak
Characters / Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore

It’s actually for the best that FF8 doesn’t let you play as a little freak

Posted on: March 25, 2024March 26, 2024

A random observation: Final Fantasy VIII breaks a streak of Final Fantasy games from 1994–2002 letting you play as freaky dudes.

Adel is incredibly ripped: an investigation
Characters / Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore

Adel is incredibly ripped: an investigation

Posted on: March 15, 2024April 27, 2024

The following real conversation occurred between this blog’s editors Phil and AL when discussing how Sorceress Adel was able to achieve so much during her despotic rule and how she got so swole (and 23 feet tall).

Laguna is a big himbo
Characters / Nonsense

Laguna is a big himbo

Posted on: March 11, 2024March 10, 2024

There was gonna be more to this post but honestly Laguna is a himbo and we all know it. What else is there to say.

SeeD: An elite mercenary force? No
Characters / Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore

SeeD: An elite mercenary force? No

Posted on: March 5, 2024March 31, 2024

SeeD is a Garden-related pun, but it has another meaning. Are they actually meeting their goals? Let’s break this down…

The Sorceress’ Knight is the Best Romance Trope Ever and Yes, I Will Die on This Hill
Characters / Essays / Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore

The Sorceress’ Knight is the Best Romance Trope Ever and Yes, I Will Die on This Hill

Posted on: March 4, 2024March 3, 2024

The Sorceress’ Knight is a gift to humanity. It is the pinnacle of bodyguard fiction, the zenith of courtly love. It is love and devotion and care wrapped up into one role and it is delicious.

The Waltz for the Moon scene is more than just a dance
Characters / Essays / Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore

The Waltz for the Moon scene is more than just a dance

Posted on: March 3, 2024March 10, 2025

One of the most iconic scenes from Final Fantasy VIII is the “Waltz for the Moon” ballroom dance. It’s the first time in the narrative that we see […]

Every FF8 boss ranked based on how bad they could fuck you up IRL
Characters

Every FF8 boss ranked based on how bad they could fuck you up IRL

Posted on: March 3, 2024November 6, 2024

A reasonable attempt to determine how fucked we’d truly be in the world of FF8.

Squall is so talented that he drinks from his eyeball
Characters / General Screaming / Nonsense

Squall is so talented that he drinks from his eyeball

Posted on: March 2, 2024November 29, 2024

Can your favorite protagonist drink from his eyeball while also being the best looking guy there? I think not. Squall 1- everyone else 0.

Get you a man who will jump into the infinite void of space for you
Characters / General Screaming

Get you a man who will jump into the infinite void of space for you

Posted on: March 1, 2024October 27, 2024

My expectations of romance are completely unrealistic because I watched Squall jump into space with absolutely no backup plan on how to save either of them when I […]

Dude, you can launch a dog off your arm
Characters / General Screaming / Nonsense

Dude, you can launch a dog off your arm

Posted on: February 29, 2024February 28, 2024

What’s not to love about a game where a legit move is that you can launch your pet dog off your arm to attack your enemies????

Selphie is a lovable, destructive menace
Characters / Essays / Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore

Selphie is a lovable, destructive menace

Posted on: February 28, 2024April 28, 2024

I have always defended characters in Final Fantasy VIII who are actually great characters (not you Quistis. You’re a creep.). I’ve written an entire piece on my personal […]

Posture check for Rinoa
Characters / General Screaming

Posture check for Rinoa

Posted on: February 26, 2024February 26, 2024

Girl what the hell your skeleton isn’t supposed to do that. No wonder you’re asleep for the entire Disc 3, your upper back’s gotta feel like shit. Have fun Angelo Searching for Motrin when you’re 30.

The art of storytelling in the Brothers Guardian Force
Characters

The art of storytelling in the Brothers Guardian Force

Posted on: February 24, 2024February 24, 2024

The Guardian Force animations are probably too long. One of the best parts of the FFVIII remaster is the ability to set the game to 300% speed, allowing […]

What the fuck is the deal with Fujin
Characters

What the fuck is the deal with Fujin

Posted on: February 24, 2024December 15, 2024

CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT.

Recent Posts

  • Whoever designs the foldout beds in the world of FF8 should be imprisoned
  • Not being able to name your party in FF8 was a bold break from tradition
  • Wait what the fuck, magic spells have only existed for like 20 years???
  • “Eyes On Me” is a better CD single than “Blue (Da Ba Dee)”
  • I wish we had seen more of Ultimecia’s bad future

Archives

  • April 2025
  • March 2025
  • February 2025
  • December 2024
  • November 2024
  • October 2024
  • September 2024
  • August 2024
  • April 2024
  • March 2024
  • February 2024

Categories

  • Blog Updates
  • Characters
  • Creativity
  • Essays
  • Game Mechanics
  • General Screaming
  • History
  • Mail Bad
  • Music
  • Narrative, Dialogue, & Lore
  • Nonsense
  • Other People Who Get It
  • Personal Stories
  • Regrettable Things

Copyright . fuck you

You can just make a website and nobody can stop you

Vector icons by Eleanor Wright

Theme Cube Blog by Kantipur Themes