You cannot eat Rinoa but it was worth trying

Yesterday, I posted a loving tribute to Devour, the silliest ability in Final Fantasy VIII. One of the limitations of Devour is that it doesn’t work on bosses. Probably for the same reason that instant death spells don’t work on bosses in other Final Fantasy games. The other reason Devour probably doesn’t work on bosses is that enemies you eat are invisibly removed from existence off-camera, which wouldn’t work well with bosses that have scripted death sequences.

A friend directed me to this Reddit post about a rumor claiming that you can use Devour on Rinoa during the boss battle where she gets junctioned to Adel. This didn’t seem possible under the rules of Devour, but I tried it just in case. It didn’t work. Final Fantasy VIII has extremely breakable game systems, which explains how a rumor like this could get started and capture people’s imagination the first place. However, eating Rinoa alive is a step too far.

Did I stay up past midnight trying to eat one of the main characters in Final Fantasy VIII? I sure did. It really did sound like the kind of nonsense that FF8 allows you to do. I regret nothing but my hunger.